Oops!
by chatnoir1
Summary: Loki is having problems with his teleportation. It's slightly off and the results are a bit unsettling. One shot.


Oops!

I do not own any of the Marvel Universe, the actual Norse myths belong to the world. They were selling Girl Scout Cookies and I seriously love Thin Mints. A plot bunny hopped up and just wouldn't go away.

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Midnight. Jane's place. Jane's queensized bed. Thor on the left side, Jane on the right. Thor rolled over towards Jane, who in turn rolled over towards him. Their lips met. Almost. There was a flash of blue light and Jane found herself locking lips with a very startled Loki. She screamed. Loudly. Thor grabbed his troublesome brother and threw him across the room, where he hit the wall, slid down, and collapsed in a giggling heap.

"Oops!" Loki's giggles turned to full scale laughs.

Jane threw a pillow at him and Thor considered reaching for Mjölnir.

Still chuckling a bit, Loki stood up, brushed himself off and pushed his hair back. "Terribly sorry about the inconvenience. I know my way around your kitchen, so carry on with whatever it was you were doing. I'm guessing foreplay?" He headed for Jane's kitchen.

_*I cannot catch a break*_ Jane thought as she got out of bed, ignoring Thor's pleading puppy eyes, and trailed after Loki.

*_I must be cursed* _Thor thought as he reluctantly left the warmth of the bed and followed Jane's lead. He could hear Loki's joyous exclamation about there being 'Thin Mints' as he entered the kitchen and sat down at the table.

Jane started the coffee and sat down next to Thor. That placed her across from Loki, who was happily stuffing his mouth with her Girl Scout Thin Mints.

"This is my new favorite cookie. In fact, when I take over this realm, I think I will make it the official cookie."

"It's a Girl Scout cookie and Girl Scout cookies are only available once a year, for a limited time." Jane snagged a cookie for herself, ignoring Loki's glare.

Loki waved a hand at her dismissively. "That's easily changed."

"Why are you here, brother?" Thor thought about helping himself to a cookie, then thought better of it. Loki did not like to share. Jane had been lucky to escaped unscathed.

Loki frowned. "Why is it that 'why are you here or what do you want' are the first things anyone ever says to me? How about a polite hello or a comment inquiring about my general health? It's very annoying."

"You're very annoying." Jane said as she placed cream and sugar on the table.

"I'm not quite sure how to respond to that. I've always thought of myself as rather terrifying, to mortals anyway." Loki crossed his arms.

"Sorry. There's nothing terrifying about you sitting at my kitchen table eating Girl Scout cookies." Jane got out three mugs. "Coffee's ready. It's self serve." Loki started to say something and Jane cut him off with "Yes, that goes for super villians with meglomaniacal tendencies and technologically challenged immortal super heroes as well."

Loki could have used his magic, but decided the hell with it, and went over to pour himself a cup. Coffee in hand, he sat back down, added cream, a copious amount of sugar, and took a sip. He waited until Thor and Jane were once again seated, then cleared his throat.

"I like to pop into Nick Fury's residence every so often. I look around, take a peek at his computer, make subtle changes. I was told that he was out, so I teleported over. I ended up in the master bathroom, which was rather odd. It got odder - Fury was present, sitting naked on his toilet. He looked at me with the most malevolent smile I have ever seen on a mortal, it actually gave me the shivers, then he reached for a weapon on the counter next to him. What kind of person carries a weapon with him to the bathroom, I ask? Well, I didn't ask him of course, I immediately teleported home before he had a chance to shoot me. At first I didn't understand why it was pitch dark and there was this unpleasant chemical odor, then I realized I was in one of the wardrobes. They were left behind by the previous tenant. I was feeling a bit unsettled at this point, so I poured myself a brandy and decided to respond to Victor's increasingly pissy text messages. He's tedious at the best of times, and I required a second brandy. After I finally got rid of Victor, I decided to pop over here, and well, you know the rest. I'm having an oops sort of day. I'm teleporting to the right location, but slightly off and I have no idea why. Any thoughts on the matter, Madame Physicist?"

Jane shrugged her shoulders. "Perhaps you're due for a payment on your karma bill. Other than that, I don't have a clue."

"How disappointing, though not unexpected." Loki popped the last of the Thin Mint cookies into his mouth. "Now I need to find a nice rage-honing activity to engage in, so I will have the proper mindset when I deal with my minions about the misinformation on Fury. I'm thinking Wii golf."

Jane tried to picture Loki playing Wii golf or Wii anything and came up blank. "You have a Wii?"

"I have a Wii, a Playstation 3, X-Box 360, PSP, Nintendo DS and 3DS. All part of my ongoing research on this realm. I even tried the MMO games. They were interesting but too time consuming." Loki stood up and brushed cookie crumbs off his clothes. "Thank you for the cookies, coffee and the kiss. Your technique could use a little polishing up. I suggest the two of you practice after I leave."

Jane made a rather rude noise at the last comment, but as usual, Loki was gone before she could respond. She looked over at Thor, who in turn studied what remained of the coffee in his cup.

"Well, aren't you going to say something about Loki's last comment?"

_*I am definitely cursed*_ Thor wasn't as dim as some thought and he knew that Loki's comment on Jane's kiss was fraught with minefields. He needed to be careful. "Loki said that because he knew it would nettle you. He is ever one to sow discord."

Jane narrowed her eyes, but decided to let Thor have this one. "That's true." She put the creamer back in the fridge and placed the cups in the sink. Good thing Loki hadn't looked in the fridge, she had four boxes of Thin Mints stashed away there, in the back, hidden in a bag. "Wanna go pick up where we left off?"

Thor grinned, stood up and followed Jane back to the bedroom. _*Maybe he wasn't cursed after all*_


End file.
